Sick of giving your kids a time out? Maybe you need one instead.

Starting the new year can be a struggle for some families. Everyone always talks about the January blues, but what then? Parents go back to work and the whole routine of school is back in full swing. It can sometimes take a few weeks to really find your feet. From night-time wake ups, packing lunches, washing, dressing, cleaning, cooking, homework, pick-ups, activities, worries about children, it can all play a part on our wellbeing. Where does it leave time for the parents?

In the middle of the madness, it is the parents that are left with the strain of family and home life. I am not saying that this means home life is an unhappy one, but let’s be honest here, it’s tough going. There can be many avenues that can lead parents to forget about themselves. Which can lead to our mental and physical health being affected.

I am here to share some Wellbeing and Lifestyle tips for parents. We must keep in tune with our mental and physical wellbeing. This is also setting an example for our littles ones.

Self Care

It is very important to get some time to ourselves – completely alone. This gives us time to breath away from the needs of others. We get the space to think about our own personal life. Sometimes people like going to the hairdressers or the luxury of a spa day.

Others just like to go for a walk,workout at the gym or have a hot bath. What ever it is, try and find the time to make it happen. It is very important to communicate with your partner about your feelings.

Understanding that you both need to find time alone to do the things you once enjoyed before having children. Loss of identity is very common amongst parents so finding time to connect with yourself again is important. Adjusting to parenthood can take time, so be kind to yourself and don’t forget that you matter too!

Time as a couple

I know trying to find time alone is tricky enough but when you might have to organise someone to watch the childrenwhile you and your partner get time to go out can be even harder. I don’t want to give you unrealistic goals but there are ways of reconnecting with your partner in between the mayhem of parenthood.

If you can get childcare, then great! Myself and my partner arrange a babysitter once a month on payday, we head out for brunch and a catch up (we call it a ‘Day Date’). Last time we went out it felt like a first date! We laughed, talked about the little ones (because let’s face it they take up a lot of our time), spoke about what was going on in our own lives as individuals and so on. If you find it hard and are unable to get someone to watch the children. Why not have a date night at home?

Make a swanky meal, candles, music , maybe a movie after and one very important tip – no phones! Knowing when to put your phone down can make such a huge difference. When you have small ones in the house their voices are the loudest. Putting your phone down, interacting and listening to your partner without the children around really can make a difference.

In day to day life small gestures can go a long way so don’t forget a kiss and cuddle here and there. Just reminding your partner that they are not forgotten, they do matter and reminding them that they are loved can make a huge difference to their day.

Family Time

Every day is different when you have children. No matter how much you try to keep a routine it can get hard to maintainevery single day. Getting everyone out of the house and doing a family activity can be big effort for some but will do everyone the world of good. I know that some of the family parks can be a hefty strain on your wallet, however, there are loads of fun free family days available throughout the whole year across The Three Counties. I understand that sometimes even going out can be stressful but try to plan ahead. There are many outdoor places you can visit, why not make it an adventure?

This will give the children time to run and explore. You can also get involved, leaving no space for the stress of a ‘big day out’. Another idea would be to redeem some family friendly restaurant vouchers. You can find loads online for local restaurants. Going somewhere knowing it is ‘family friendly’ can be a comfort for parents.

Just remember, no matter what stage your children are at its all temporary and if you are having a hard time it will soon pass. Having time as individuals and as a family is important. Actively making it happen can play a part towards yourpositive mental and physical wellbeing.

About me

Hello, My name is Liz Alexander. I am mum of two and a true believer as a parent that self care is vital. After having my first child I neglected my own personal needs which led to many problems. Growing and connecting with ‘me’ as a person again became very important. Many parents struggle with loss of identity and I want to remind them that they matter too.